Pledge

Continuing my mission of visiting all Shoppers' Stop outlets in the country (hehe...whot a mission!) I checked out the one at Harrington Road, Chennai. I guess I have visited every outlet in Mumbai, the one at Gurgaon and also Kolkata. I have a long way to go...and I will:) The best part of the whole trip was that I actually knew the way from home all the way to the SS outlet. Whoa! Was I overjoyed!!! I also know the route to my office but that has some unfair advantages over SS –
1. The 100 ft from Anna Nagar to Guindy has as many turns as a straight line possibly can. And Me Mumbaikar may not know that the hindi word for 'kantha' is actually 'pyaaz' but I do know a straight road when I see one.
2. I have been on that single straight road twice a day, six days a week, twenty-four days a month for the past 3 months
But this one to SS outlet had as many twists and turns as a Balaji soap, one-ways and subways (so very unique in Chennai)...I traversed all that and landed at SS at about 5 p.m. for some relaxed shopping as also window, shadow, etc shopping.
It was not too crowded for a Sunday evening...i wondered why. Then dawned the realisation that it was the IPL final between Rajasthan Royals and Chennai Super Kings. Regular readers (I know that is a non-existing tribe....but it kinda sounds kewl. Like there are actually ppl in this world, except my dear mister, who read this blog) might curiously note that my lack of posting wrt IPL coincided with Mumbai Indians losing matches in quick succession. Let me assure you that it is so. I shut my eye like the proverbial cat and thought if I don’t acknowledge it, it has'nt happened. Damn the team...not even semi-finals? That too at a time when mister and I were having one of our famous 'Mumbai is better than Chennai' arguments. Mr. Tendulkar, do you know what all I had to endure thanks to you and our team?? Anyways I am sure we'll win it next time.
That was why I was not too interested in that final in which Mumbai's only participation was the location....but can u have better crowds anywhere else ;) Having realized the match schedule, mister decided that shopping, snacking, burping, negotiating with auto guy and travelling back home had to be completed by 8.00 pm. I was ok with the rest, but negotiating with auto guy??? Impossible!
Our list had 2 trousers and 1 perfume in it...if I was shopping alone, be assured I would have bought everything except the trousers and perfume. If hubby dearest had walked in alone he would have been in time for Rajasthan's net practice the previous day. BUT as they say love is blind, maybe foolish, which is why he took me along ;) I wanted pot pourri. He said trousers. I almost bought '3 mistakes of my life' by 'Chetan Bhagat'. Mister said trousers. I gazed longingly at the latest collection of 'Hidesign'. Mister dragged me to the trouser section. Aaaaaargh! Those trousers! I had a tough time juggling between shopping and sticking to the list.
Hats off to my hubby! He managed to rummage through n number of shelves stocking x+y+z number of brands, pick 3 of which he liked (am still wondering how can a human being like ONLY 3!), find a trial room, try all 3 trousers, select 2 out of them, give measurements and negotiate with the shop assistant on time to be taken for alteration, all under half hour. By this time I would have decided that I should not be buying long kurtas since I have too many and maybe I should look at medium length or short kurta though not too jazzy & with too much work on it cos I had a few of those and my main requirement was for casual weekend wear. And this guy actually, believe me, actually completed his entire shopping for, what I am sure is, another 8-10 months. He would’ve paid the bill too but for the tech snag at the bill counter. Having paid the bill and getting membership cards and plethora of points for our half hour shopping we proceeded to the perfume counter, though not before issuing numerous threats on what all we could do to the shop assistant and his family if we did not get the altered to the perfect 43” within 20 minutes. That was mister’s scheduled time for buying perfume. Snigger, snigger
We sniffed our way to the ground floor where perfume man was waiting with coffee beans in his hand “Some perfumes, sir!” This has always bothered me. Only the perfume and cosmetics people ask us to buy their products. The garments, shoes, bags, etc counter staff never do that. Why’ o’ why? Guess that shall remain one of my life’s unanswered questions.
Then begun our hunt for the perfect perfume for my mother-in-law -light, daily-wear types. I almost fainted sometime after the 35th perfume and hubby did the same after he saw the price tag. We finally settled on a ‘pure lightness’ perfume which coincidentally was the first one we tried. Then started my actual shopping. It would have been scandalous if I actually bought only what I intended to. I mean what about retail boom and consumerism? So I picked some cosmetics and another perfume for hubby after sniffing through the coffee beans for like hundred times.
We paid for these stuff, accumulated more points on our membership card. I bravely fought for more points to be accumulated but mister would have none of it. He marched to the trouser guy to get the altered ones. When I think of it today, if that had been ready then, maybe things would have been different. But it was not to be. Destiny! What else can I say? They needed another ten minutes to get the perfect fit. It was that moment that mister made probably one of the top five blunders of his life. He said those ‘you-know-what’ words –“Sowmya, why don’t you see if you like anything?”
He did’nt realize then that he would reach home only after Shane Warne would reach his. So off we went to the ladies’ section of the store…………
I admit that on most occasions buying a formal shirt / trouser is a traumatic experience for me. It would, for you too, if you weighed even 20% less than me. My general approach in such a situation is to pick the biggest size available. Then I feel so good about myself when it is slightly big for me and pick one size smaller wherein I feel ‘thin’. That’s a pick-me-up I often use. Feel free to borrow the idea….you’ll feel great!!! So I scanned all the brands available, picked quite a few I liked and proceeded to the trial room. On the way tragedy struck. My route was blocked, barricades in front of me in the form of my mister. He relieved me of many shirts and all I was left with were a mere 4. Maybe he realized his mistake and was trying to make the best of his situation but destiny always has its own way. For once, I got a trial room without being reminded of the ticket queues at peak time in Thane station. Wow! This was turning to be a nice day. At the perfect moment when I locked myself in and began trying out the shirts the Electricity God decided to play truant. Poof went the power and I was stuck inside for all of 3 minutes. How I survived that long in the pitch dark room with only myself to look at on all four side merits a post all by itself. Right, it was scary.
After that cam the bigger scar(e). I did not fit into the first shirt I tried. Thinking I picked the wrong size, I tried shirt 2. Same result. I started to get oh-so-slightly worried. When shirt 3 also refused to yield to my demands I let out a cry of anguish. What am I to do now? Can I never shop again? Do I need circus tents as mister so often teases me? All those blissfully happy moments of scanning through few thousands of garments and picking the 50 I liked. Then trying them on, selecting the 30 best through carefully devised scientific procedures combined with the ever reliable close-my-eyes-and-touch-one methodology in which I always end up touching 2. What do I do now? What do I live for? Can I ever enter a store again? Will I be able to lead a normal life again?
I ran out of the trial room, dumped the rogue shirts in a corner and ran far far from the garment section to the ‘Crossword’ where I am not judged by inches, feet, shapes and such other disgraceful yardsticks. I scanned through shelves and shelves of books –my best friends. Mister found me gazing longingly at the ‘Top 10’ list. He did’nt budge, not giving any allowances for the fact that I was just recovering from such a major trauma. He left me waiting at the entrance of the store and went to find his altered trousers. I am sure, by now, you must be tearing your hair apart to find out what the title of the post has got to do with the actual post. Well, here it comes.
As I was waiting I happened to spot an open book. Enquiries and further investigations revealed that it was a pledge book. Basically everyone could write down something as their pledge and hopefully fulfill it sometime in their life. The concept sounded cool. I read the previous entries which ranged from selfish desires to world peace. I was inspired. I borrowed a pen from one Mr.Perfume and proceeded to pledge –
‘I pledge that I will use my skills and talents to the optimum so as to be useful to myself, my family and the world at large.’
How does that sound? Well, don’t ask me as to what I am doing to that end. This is the first step and the agenda for the week was only to make the pledge. I shall figure out something soon and definitely keep you guys posted! Mister was back with his 2 new trousers and we set off. Then came his casual question, “so how many kilos did you pledge to lose?” I was stumped. Why did I not think of that? Another unanswered question of my life!
We reached home on dot at 8 with mister complaining that he would miss the opening batsmen walk from the pavilion to the crease. Well, well the match started at 8.15 and he did not miss a single step!
I’ll be going to Westside next week in my eternal quest for the perfect shirt. Keep watching this space.

P.S. Hubby, I know you would probably be the only one to read this. But you know my temptation for exaggeration far exceeds that for even chocolate and that I am only doing this to improve my writing skills. (Obviously! No doubt! ;)